The big 40 is looming large in the not too distant future. Time marches on relentlessly. Even the clocks spring forward to bring the big day closer. So what to do? Why not take a trip back in time. I wonder what was number one on the day I was born?
I really wish I hadn’t. The biggest selling single on the day I came to be was “Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep” by Middle of the Road. Thanks to pissed up Brits partying on the costas and Tony Blackburn, this song was propelled to the top of the charts where it stayed for 5 weeks. It unbelievably went on to sell more than 10 million copies world-wide. Sangria is potent stuff for sure!
The only thing more depressing was the following number 1 hit in the UK was seriously cool. To just delay my arrival by 21 days would not only mean the big 40 would be a little further away, my number 1 would be T-Rex’s “Get in on!”. I would also be a lion rather than the crab. There are no downsides to this. My life would have been a whole lot better! Thanks Mum and Dad. You have ruined my life!
Maybe I could cheat my past. What if I was born in the good ol’ US of A? I’d be on to a winner. The Billboard number 1 in the US was The Rolling Stones with “Brown Sugar”. Suddenly being American becomes a no-brainer. Who cares that England can’t play football. 40 odd years of hurt? Hello! I wouldn’t give a toss about football. It would be Grid Iron. And America always finish as world champions. That would be like TOTALLY AWESOME!
But before I could even look into becoming a US Citizen my fantasy came crashing down. It was a mistake. A typo on the poxy web page I had pinned all my hopes on. “Brown Sugar” was not number 1 from May 29th to July 11th 1971. No, Mick’s tune could only make in to June 11th. My number 1 was “It’s too Late” by Carole King. As good a tune as it is, it’s not the Rolling Stones. Not cool. You can stick your American football up yer arse!
So what to do? Search the world for a country that had decent musical taste on the day that I was born? As the wise sage Omar from The Wire would say, “Indeed!”. I could be a pommie basher. Good at sports. Decent weather and I do enjoy a good Barbie. Number 1 Down Under was the promisingly named group “Daddy Cool” with “Eagle Rock”. Check out the video. I think I have a winner!
But what about my adopted country? What did the music loving Spaniards buy with their pesatas back in the day? “Que Sera” by Jose Feliciano and they loved it. It was number 1 for 8 weeks from the 29th May to the 24th July. I could revel in “La Roja’s” victorious Euro and World cup wins. An added bonus is I don’t have to bother looking up the number 1 tune in Italy as the song is Italian. Can I claim the Italian World Cup win too?
Which to choose? It’s a tough call. G’day mate!
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