Shane had booked his party at the Stanley Square club in Stalybridge. He was preparing all the food himself. Well, he asked Papá to make his “World Famous” potato ash (Three pans of the bloody stuff) and Denise was in charge of the buffet. Relations in both the Burkett and Schofield households were stretched to breaking point due to this classic Schofield scrooge tactic. Mamá and Papá were at each other’s throats whenever the words “potato ash” were heard. Meanwhile Denise had kicked Shane out of the house after botching up a simple task. “I ask him to do one thing….”. That was your first mistake Denise!
We arrived at the party around 8:30pm. An hour later than I had told Rawdo and Craig so we received ironic applause on arrival and plenty of abuse. They soon turned to their favourite baiting trick of discussing their tax returns with me. Rawdo was gutted that he had an astronomical tax bill of £80 for last year. Never tip a taxi driver again! The timeless “lets all laugh at City” response is as reliable as ever, even with their billions in the bank.
Rawdo and Craig depressed about their tax liabilities.
Mamá and Papá were sat with Uncle Martin and Auntie Lyn on a nearby table. Papá sitting restlessly, getting up every 5 minutes to check on the potato ash. He still managed to burn part of it. “I’ll mix that in when everyone is pissed” was his plan. Seemed to work as two and a half pans were consumed over the night. Shane giving the Ash his thumbs up and will probably finish off the stuff for lunch.
Mamá, Lyn, Martin and Papá at the party.
Shane likes the Ash.
The DJ was busy playing all Shane’s favourites from the 80’s. The problem was his playlist consisting of OMD et al didn’t seem to get anyone on the dance floor. People finally got up when the DJ succumbed and put Wham on and classics from the sixties.
We were soon treated to one of Shane’s master classes in public speaking. He thanked everyone for coming (“Cheers you lot”); presented flowers to the women who had helped prepare the food and the room for the party (“Come and get yer flowers then!) and hoped that everyone would enjoy the rest of their evening (“Right lets get pissed!”).
Shane gives another masterclass in public speaking.
The evening came to a close around 12:30am for us. Shane and a few of the party headed off to Stalybridge to carry on. We were in no fit state to continue so headed back home with the family. All to do again tomorrow night!
Shane and Monica.
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